Holding Your Breath

Do you want to swim with the swimmers
Or sink in the sand?
But don't pass judgement
Because you never know what lies
80,000 leagues under the sea

Time passes
And I see I'm a child
Walking in on parents fucking
I am one in a million
But no, I am one

When I fall so clearly
I learn what I can
But I prefer to let it go in one ear and out the other
Me and my hands
Laugh at your pretension
We sing to each other about nonsense
Though we are bloody and disheveled
Soaking wet

I dream of the day
When I pack up my mind
What little of it I own
And swim into the forever if forever

Rushin On Your Run

Because I think
I started at the end
And the end is so small
And it seems I've been fighting ever since
To push my way back to the middle

And I keep my stitches in
So people won't laugh
When they see how I hide outside

And probably its all the middle

I sleep there every night
Always in circles
And if I get there or not
I wait
Because I can't stop spending all of my time watching all of my time
While we live on the second hand
I am shocked by how slow
We go

And I sit
Like I did as a child
A yesterday ago
With the ghost of a junkie
And the love that made me real
And the juice that made it so eager
To live like Jesus
Too much to break and too much time to do it

I still remember being a child
And I scream to no one
How much I want to go back
And
How much I want to go home

And I know I can tell somebody
But I want to tell everybody
So I don't think I will tell anybody

The Blue Ladies

In a room
Lies two women
Both women
Wear Blue
Both point out
That they both
Wear Blue

She sings a happy song about wearing blue

You are
So happy
Yes
And you know
Why
Is it because
You have
Jesus
In your life?

Yes
It is because
I have
Jesus in my life

The next day both women are wearing blue

Realignment

Car crash

In the land of God

Where worlds collide

I am overtaken by

Unethical beurocracy

And I’m sure I tell it wrong

But I’ve been rewired so many times

I’m lucky I can say it at all

You sleep lightly

Just like me

Knowing those who don’t wake up

You sleep lighter

Just like me

Knowing those who will

And we both see the difference

Measured in fat and heroin

One cut out

Another pasted in

Like a third grade project

That always looked uglier than the rest

And it seems everyone is having so much fun

And you thought you could fool us all

You just might have

We separate in God’s playground

Men to the right

Women in the basement

People underestimate your ability

To live life in a TV

You are so sure

That all that glitters is gold

And when the glass broke

It aimed at all of our eyes

And you came home with the news

And you were never forgiven

The fate of a nation

Lies in a montage of disasters

And as you pull it apart

We see it bleed with the gore of God

And now on his deathbed

Like the one before

He is blinded

By the glass that he broke

Unholy temptation and the (child)ren of a Shiksa

And I can’t feel sorry for you

The world took a backseat

For men who can’t speak

But you turned your head

To avoid the drama

And now I keep my eyes open

To watch that door

Open and shut

A man is hit by a car

The entire world is realigned,

Manually.

Maternal Instinct

What they say is true

You look better in pieces

It’s too difficult to grasp

That

I don’t get enough

From a dated board game

If you look far enough up my nose

You may just see my brain

But inside you’re just as blind as I thought

Whatever you do,

You can’t call it love

So full of today

But yesterday is just as important as tomorrow

I live in a big house

But I sleep in a small box

Everything is so empty its full

And if I let it all catch fire

I’m sure there wouldn’t be much to burn

I turn to the left

And the clock keeps ticking

But is anyone keeping time?

Always tripping up

Takes a toll on your feet

You could trace it all back to a poloroid

But no one has the energy to try

Confusion is trite

Do not, see not

You always taught me

To never let the truth get in the way of your story

And always keep the TV on

Just as long as nobodys watching

Unscrew the lightbulb

And the entire world is yours

Everything looks prettier when the lights are out

I always needed to try so hard

But the clock kept ticking

And no one kept time

Sleep before you wake up

But understand

That it’s to hard  to run in your dreams

And even when you try to open your eyes

Theres too much holding them shut

Live you life

If you call it that

Separate, but not together

Conjoined

And you are alone

In a valley of dolls